Each time I get questions regarding my marriage plans, relationship and ‘him’, I don’t know if i should respond, vent, scream, cry, stay silent, ignore or simply walk away. My mum, guardians and older friends keep reminding me that when they were my age, they had 1,2,3 kids and set up interview panels where i get questioned concerning who he is, where he is, what he does and what the plan is- when actually, there is no ‘he’.
Eventually, I know I’ll meet someone, fall in love, get married and have a family of my own. I get constant reminders that i’m only 5 months away from clocking 24. I really do wanna marry early- at most at 26, but i’m 23 and still rediscovering a lot about me, working on my self, working my ass out on an 8-5 inorder to get a meal and some makeup on when i need to and yea, it’s still not all that rosy…at least not in the least bit and i have a problem with comparison.
I’m still availably single and having to deal with my relocation and a new job which is barely 4 months new, the bills and my dreams all in a single pack is enough headache already. I do wanna be really successful before i finally settle. I do wanna go on trips, have fun, explore the world, get the best outta life and live my dreams ‘ALONE’ for now without any drama inbetween. So, I don’t know when i’ll be getting married, where and to who.
Did I tell you about my fears as well?……………………………………………………………….. It does scare me a lot to know that for the rest of my married life, i’ll be sleeping and waking up to one person beside me- same face, same voice, probably same character and all. I’ll be making love to this same person who’ll become the father of my kids. I’ll be sharing my space, thoughts, possessions and emotions with this same person for life. I dread the misunderstandings, the stories from couple, the pregnancy, child bearing and raising, so much more you have no idea about.
Before you ask when I’ll be getting married; kindly ask how far gone I am in realizing my dreams and share some dream-speed-lifting ideas with me. Cheers!!!